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Treatment & Therapy

How to Have a Good Relationship with Your BPD Therapist

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BPD therapist relationshipPeople diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) are notorious for having difficult relationships with their therapist. They may be distrustful of their therapist, refuse to reveal pertinent information, or act out during sessions. People with BPD also have high rates of self-harmful and other destructive behaviors that make successful therapy difficult.

As a result, many therapists choose not to treat people with Borderline Personality Disorder. This can leave you feeling as though you have nobody to turn to when it comes to treating your BPD.

But it is possible to have a good relationship with your therapist so that you can get the BPD treatment you need. Here are some ways to begin:

Be Open with Your BPD Therapist

The point of therapy is to talk about what you are feeling and thinking so that you can learn to better manage your BPD symptoms and learn healthy coping skills. Sitting in a session with your therapist and not saying a word, withholding relevant information, or lying will only delay the process of you making a recovery from BPD. While it may take some time for you to trust your therapist and feel comfortable opening up, know that your therapist has your best interests in mind and will hold what you tell them in confidence.

Work on Self-Defeating Behaviors

Even if you want to have a good relationship with your therapist, certain behaviors are always going to make that difficult. Skipping sessions, acting hostile toward your therapist, or dropping out of treatment will make it difficult to get the BPD treatment you need. Working on these at the beginning of therapy can help you to get the most out of your treatment.

Expect Guidance, Not Instructions

Your therapist isn’t there to tell you what to do or how to live your life. They are there to help guide you and teach you new skills that you can apply. Don’t expect your BPD therapist to have all the answers, and don’t get mad or frustrated if you don’t immediately get the results you want. Effective therapy takes time and patience.

Do What Is Required for BPD Treatment

Certain therapies, such as Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), require homework assignments that will help you practice and improve your newly learned skills. If you are getting BPD treatment through DBT, be sure to do any required assignments so you get the best treatment possible. Part of successful BPD treatment may also require you to take medications to treat such co-occurring disorders as depression or anxiety. If you are given a prescription, be sure to take it as prescribed. Following the recommendations of your BPD therapist will go a long way to helping you recover from BPD.

Learn to Trust Your BPD Therapist

People with Borderline Personality Disorder can have problems with interpersonal relationships and issues with abandonment. This can lead to them being distrustful of their therapist and not taking what they say to heart. If you’re going to have a good relationship with your therapist – and get the BPD treatment you need – you’re going to have to trust them. Trust that what they are telling you is valid and that you can share your innermost thoughts and feelings with them. If you don’t feel as though you can trust your therapist, find one who you can.

Find a Good BPD Therapist

Not all therapists are qualified to treat Borderline Personality Disorder. In order to have a good relationship with your therapist, you should be sure to find one who can give you the specific treatment you need. In most cases, that means finding a therapist trained in DBT. Do your research before selecting a BPD therapist to make sure you find one that works for you.

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